Sin ah git some free time oan mah hauns, ah figured I’d tell ye a' aboot th' time mah mukkers 'n' ah ran up a $300 quid tab 'n' $500 in damages at oor local pub, Murph’s. It a' stairted yin Friday nicht efter ah left th' distillery. Rob called me up 'n' tellt me tae come ower tae his place fur a few brews. Whin ah git thare thae goons hud awready stairted drinkin wi'oot me 'n' wur bonny far alang intae th' case o' McEwans. Ah grabbed a boattle oot o' th' fridge 'n' gaed 'n' sat doon wi' thaim in th' living room. Th' telly. Wis oan 'n' 'twas replaying an auld footy match atween Dunfermline Athletic FC. 'n' Ayr United. Na yin wis really paying attention tae it. A' 'twas daein' wis providing background noise.

Within hauf an oor o' me bein' thare we hud awready finished th' case 'n' moved onto whiskeys wi' ice. By this time we wur getting bonny rowdy. We wur a' standing up yelling at ilk ither 'n' haein a grand ol time. We wur giving Murph shit fur th' baird he brought hame th' ither nicht, whew; she wis quite th' non-looker haha. He stairted tae tak' some offense tae th' jeers 'n' eventually shoved mah pal Eric o'er th' room! Wance Eric git up they stairted gaun at it, 'n' we let it go’ oan’ fur a few minutes, laughing oor asses aff th' hail time afore separating th' twa. Efter we a' teuk a couple mair drinks 'n' laughed it a' aff. This shuid huv bin th' foremaist sign nae tae go doon tae th' pub….